Wisdom Wednesday #27 - Shalom In The Home

שלום

Shalom (  שלום )  is a Hebrew word that has several meanings.  It can mean hello or goodbye, and it also means peace.  

My husband and I pursue peace in our home by keeping an atmosphere of kindness, patience, tolerance and love.  Yes, there are times we get on each other's nerves, especially since we are both retired now, but we work at keeping peace a priority. 

I was talking with a young married woman recently who asked how I cope with my husband not following through on projects or not picking up after himself.  I told her this:  I pray about it first, sometimes for days.  Then I pick a time where I know we can totally focus on each other without distractions.  I tell him what is bothering me, and he always responds with love and care.  He apologizes and takes action to correct the problem.  I do the same for him.  

Now, does he ever forget that conversation and do the same thing again?  If it is a major issue, no, he does not.  If it's a minor issue such as piling up papers on his desk or leaving his shoes in the living room, yes, he sometimes does. That's when I say to myself, "How important is it?"  When I compare this thing to all the other things he does for me, is it really that important?  Most times, it's not and I just let it go.  It's just not worth harping or nagging about it.  It destroys my heart peace and my home peace.   I just pick up his shoes and remind myself that he always opens the door for me, or that he makes coffee for me every morning, or he washes the dishes for me.  His good qualities far outweigh the little things he forgets sometimes. 

I make the choice daily to be thankful for my husband's many virtues.  He does the same for me. We also speak of our love and admiration for each other daily.  This goes a long way to create peace in our home.  

When I focus on those things, the other irritations become trivial, and peace reigns in my heart and in our home.  I also like to remind myself of this verse to remind myself not to nag:

 A continual dropping in a very rainy day 

and a contentious woman are alike. (Proverbs 27:15)

Next week, I'll share more about shalom. I'd love to hear how you pursue peace in your home and marriage.


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 I'm linking up today with:
 Spiritual Sunday

The Gathering Spot Link-Up

All Things Bright and Beautiful Link-Up

Modest Mom Monday Link-up 

Growing Homemakers Link-Up

Titus 2 Tuesday 

Tuesdays with a Twist

A Hope in Every Season Homemaking Link-Up  
Wordless Wednesdays 

Winsome Wednesday

A Wise Woman Builds
Whole Hearted Wednesday 
Wake Up Wednesday
Whimsical Wednesday

Hearts for Home
Favorite Things 

Fab Creative Friday
Friendship Friday 
Freedom Friday

Wisdom Wednesday #14 - A Blessing for Wives

Continueing our study of Proverbs 31, this week I will share how this passage is incorporated into our weekly Shabbat service. 

On Shabbat we take a break from our mundane weekly routine. It is a time to regroup and pray, to eat and rejoice, to spend time with family and friends, to study and share.  Most of all, we turn away from the world and draw near to Hashem.  It is a time to be refreshed.

In our synagogue, we do the traditional Jewish liturgy in both Hebrew and English.  My husband, Rabbi Jem, leads the service, but I have a part also.  Each week, I light the candles (see the photo above) and say this prayer:  

Blessed are You, oh L-rd, our G-d, King of the Universe; Who has sanctified us in Your Word, and given us Yeshua our Messiah, and commanded us to be light to the world.  Ah-main.

Later, during the liturgy, my husband leads the husbands of the congregation in the blessing of the wife:  

A woman of valor who can find, she is worth far more than precious jewels.  The heart of her husband safely trusts in her, and he profits greatly thereby. (based on Proverbs 31)

It is such a good feeling to be blessed by my husband.  He looks into my eyes and shows me his approval as he speaks the blessing.  I love it.

My husband not only does this on Shabbat, but every day of our lives.  He often says, "Have I told you today how much I love you?"  Usually, he already has. (big smile here)

Every morning he greets me with, "Good morning, Gorgeous."  As I said last week, I am far from gorgeous first thing in the morning, but I love hearing it.

He compliments my cooking no matter what I put on the table.  Even if all I do is open a can of soup he says, "This is a delicious meal."  

I say, "All I did was open the can and warm it up."  

He'll smile and say, "But you do it so well." 

I am very blessed to be loved by him, and I pray to never take it for granted.  I love him, too, and I esteem him above every man I've ever known.  I know part of the reason he is such a fine gentleman is the teachings he received from his conservative Jewish father and mother.  They have passed away, but I am grateful to them for teaching him to be such a loving, kind husband.  

He is what is known in Judaism as a "mensch" - a good, righteous man.  His favorite saying is, "Do the right thing,"  and he is a perfect example of practicing what he preaches.  

No matter where we are, he is constantly on the look out for someone who needs help. A good example:  last week, a big box fell off a truck at an intersection.  He stopped the car, got out, and picked up the debris.  Another time, he spent twenty minutes trying to retrieve a little girl's wayward balloon in a grocery store.  What a guy.

I admire him, respect him and am so honored to be his wife and partner in ministry.  I love being loved by him.


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I'm sharing this post at:

Spiritual Sunday

Let's Get Social Sunday

Modest Mom Monday Link-up 

Gratituesday at Heavenly Homemakers!

Teach Me Tuesday

Titus 2 Tuesday 

Tuesdays with a Twist

A Hope in Every Season Homemaking Link-Up
Wordless Wednesdays 

Winsome Wednesday

A Wise Woman Builds
Whole Hearted Wednesday 
Wake Up Wednesday

Hearts for Home
Favorite Things 

Faith Filled Friday
Friendship Friday 
Freedom Friday 

31 Days of Praying For Our Children - Day 11

 

The older women likewise, to behave the way people living a holy life should .  They shouldn't be slanderers or slaves to excessive drinking.  They should teach what is good., thus training the younger women to love their husbands and children.  To be self-controlled and pure, to take good care of their homes and submit to their husbands.  In this way, G-d's message will not be brought into disgrace. (Titus 2: 3-5)

Father, I pray that my daughters will see their role as women, wives, homemakers, and mothers as a calling from You .  I pray they will honor their husbands as the head of their homes and partners in the work You've called them to as spouses.

Oh, Father, it grieves me that the world teaches women to be unholy, immodest, foul-speaking, and hateful. I pray my children will see the folly of this and choose instead to walk in holiness, according to Your Holy Word.

I pray they will dress modestly and in a way that honors You as well as their husbands.  I pray they will not want to follow You more than  fashion.  I pray they will understand that immodesty can cause men to stumble.

I pray they will also behave with modesty, not with the loudness, foul-speaking and brazeness that is portrayed in music, television and movies today.    I pray they will guard their tongues and avoid the evil  tongue (lashon hora).  I pray they will bless and not curse, and use their speech to build up, bless and teach others Your ways.

I pray they will not drink to excess or be drawn to people or groups who pride themselves with drunkenness.  I pray that the party scene and people who love it will be repugnant to them, because going that way leads to spiritual death. 

Thank You that both of my daughters have good husbands. I pray they will love their husbands and children and realize the high calling of being a wife and a mother.  I pray they will understand Your blessings, freedom and protection of being submitted to their husband's leadership.   I pray that my daughters will  honor their husbands and be good help-meets for them, building them up, and  praying for them.

I pray that my daughters will honor You and not bring disgrace on You by their words or actions.  I also pray they will teach younger women these things, and that they will pass these things on to future generations.  I pray they will take these verses in Titus 2 and Proverb 31 to heart and make them their ideal as women, wives, homemakers, and mothers.